do you KEEP the reciepts
for the friends that you buy
and ain’t it bittersweet
you’re only just getting by

but i hope you know
that it wont let go
it sticks around with you until the day you die
and i hope you know
that it’s touch and go
i hope the tears dont stain the world that waits outside
where did it all go wrong?

and until you’ve repaid
the dreams you’ve bought for your lies
you’ll be cast away
alone under stormy skies
alone under stormy skies

but i hope you know
That it won’t let go
it sticks around with you until the day you die
and i hope you know
that it’s touch and go
i hope the tears dont stain the world that waits outside
where did it all go wrong?

but i hope you know
that it won’t let go
it sticks around with you untill the day you die

and I hope you know
that it’s touch and go
i hope the tears dont stain the world that waits outside

but i hope you know
that it won’t let go
it sticks around with you untill the day you die

and I hope you know
that

it’s touch and go
i hope the tears dont stain the world that waits outside

where did it all go wrong?
____________________________________________________________

Some days I feel………..lost.

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When do I get my happiness back?

I thought I put in my dues, but I guess I didn’t give enough.

Damn…I think it’s sleepy sleepy time. I should feel better in the morning.

I just wish I knew what I was doing…

My first year that I was down here in Southern California, my first Valentine’s Day was pretty cool. I sent some cards, some chocolate, and love out to a few people. The next year I didn’t feel the same, so didn’t send out anything, and I don’t think I got anything except cards from my family. As time has gone by I’ve gotten a little bitter about the 14th of February. It’s just another day for the stores to reap in some cash during a slow month. I mean if you truly love the person you’re with then the so called “Valentine’s Day” happens multiple times of the year with no reason or rhyme.

You just go out and DO IT.

You come home with some surprise flowers, buy her a bear, jewelery, dinner, whatever. When she asks why, you say “Because I love you!” That’s it, you don’t need one day to lump all of your life’s savings into and hope you make it through the rest of the year. That’s just stupid.

Valentine’s Day brings so many good memories of when I was younger. Giving out candy hearts to your friends, making cards to give to girls, eating candy, and acting silly. After I left home, it’s been pretty devoid to me and several other friends of mine. It’s such a stupid topic, people are either really happy about it and are looking forward to it, or others are dreading it, wondering who they can hook up with so that they at least won’t be alone and will have a “Valentine.”

I guess if I was a player, then Guillermo’s advice would work well. Think about it…girls probably don’t want to be alone on Valentine’s day as much if not more then guys. So, wash up, put on some nice clothes, spray on some cologne, and say hello ladies!

Meh…whatever. Not me. Getting nice to look nice, sure, getting nice to play the field…bah. I’ve never been good at it, and even if I was my personality wouldn’t allow it. I’m too nice to be a jack-ass.

Any who, I hope those of you that did have someone had a good day. For the rest of us, remember this…

Valentine’s chocolate goes on sale! Woot woot!

Some mornings you wake up feeling down.

And some mornings you can’t distinguish between the two.

Things that happen in life are quite interesting to watch unfold. You’re writing your own story while others are writing theirs and sometimes both of your books match up, and then move on. I’ve been raving quite a bit recently, and have been having a blast at every event that I’ve been to. The only time that I didn’t have a full loaded night of fun was last night when we went to Lyrics for a Victoria’s Secret Valentine’s Rave. I wish I had done more research, and I wish that my friend knew that she wasn’t going to get to dance during one of her DJ friend’s sets because I probably would have chosen to not go. The night did have some fun times, I mean we got to chat with Royal a bit, and I got to say hello to Andrey again. Last time I saw him was at Nocturnal Wonderland 2005, my first rave.

Maybe it’s the scene that’s got me wiggin a little. Maybe it’s the rave, Event Horizon 2006, I’m going to tonight. Maybe it’s because Grant’s here and he doesn’t like raves at all and I put him through hell last night, I dunno. There are so many possible reasons, but trying to pinpoint which it is really doesn’t do anything but burn time, and that’s not something I have a lot of these days.

I dunno, maybe I want to be able to hang out with certain people from the scene outside of the rave so that it feels like we’re real friends that I can call to say hello, talk to, and hang out with, rather then feeling like I only know them at the rave. I guess that’s partly my fault since I’m 25 and most of them aren’t near that age. Maybe I have more time under my belt and want more then a quick weekend pick-me-up. Maybe I’m scared, and I think this is true whether the previous statement is true or not. Anyone that I hang out with that is under 18 I put myself in jeopardy. My friend found this out the hard way when the law stated that 18 is 18 and it doesn’t matter if she turns 18 in a week, 17 isn’t 18.

I’m not much for taking non-calculable risks, and the one thing if nothing else that I learned back in High School is that girls are completely 100% incalculable. They are definitely unique, and that’s probably what strikes the most fear into me. I’ve always been able to figure most things out, but never once have I figured out girls.

Oh well, guess that’s the fun puzzles of life.

1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

2. Don’t worry about what people think, they don’t do it very often.

3. Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian anymore than standing in a garage makes you a car.

4. Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.

5. If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you’ve never tried before.

6. My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.

7. Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious.

8. It is easier to get forgiveness than permission.

9. For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program.

10. If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip.

11. Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of cheques.

12. A conscience is what hurts when all of your other parts feel so good.

13. Eat well, stay fit, die anyway.

14. Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it.

15. No man has ever been shot while doing the dishes.

16. A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.

17. Middle age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places.

18. Opportunities always look bigger going than coming.

19. Junk is something you’ve kept for years and throw away three weeks before you need it.

20. There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.

21. Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.

22. By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends.

23. Thou shalt not weigh more than thy refrigerator.

24. Someone who thinks logically provides a nice contrast to the real world.

25. It ain’t the jeans that make your butt look fat.

26. If you had to identify, in 1 word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, & never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be “meetings.”

27. There is a very fine line between “hobby” and “mental illness.”

28. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.

29. You should not confuse your career with your life.

30. Nobody cares if you can’t dance well. Just get up and dance.

31. Never lick a steak knife.

32. The most destructive force in the universe is gossip.

33. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time.

34. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she’s pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.

35. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age eleven.

36. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above average drivers.

37. A person, who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person. (This is very important. Pay attention. It never fails.)

38. Your friends love you anyway.

39. Thought for the day: Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.

“Learn as if you were going to live forever. Live as if you were going to die tomorrow.” - Mahatma Gandhi

So…lets see here. What have I been doing. Well, after school got out I went to a few more raves. Maybe if I feel giddy I’ll go back and write some posts about them. I went to Identity (which was a super hero based rave), Nightmare B4 X-Mas (themed after the movie), Together as One (super sick New Years massive), and lastly Reset 2006 (I don’t know really what the theme was…probably gaming themed but it rocked none the less!). It’s been fun, the raves are fun as heck, the people are cool, the music is awesome, and the vibe is insane. Pure fun!

School starts tomorrow, so that will be both cool and not so cool. It won’t be cool because I was unable to get any of my classes during early and late registration for one reason or another. This means that I will be begging each teacher to allow me to sign up for a class and for 2 weeks I’ll be in limbo. The cool part is that my fraternity will be starting back up and getting active again. This rocks because that means I will ALWAYS have something to do Thursday nights. I don’t really know what’s going to happen with the rave scene once things start back up. I’ve got a lot of obligations this semester, so I hope to make 2 a month, but trying to make every weekend, though fun, would be costly and might leave me with no personal downtime. /shrug

I’m also hoping to get a job this semester. I know I’ve talked about it previous semesters, but I think I really need to get one and hold something. My resume looks weak, and people don’t really like seeing family business related work on my resume. Besides that fact, I would like to do it for the experience and to get some dinero built back up in my accounts. The fraternity and raving isn’t as cheap as I thought it would be, so to have a supplemental income to cover the unknown excess would be kewl.

I’ve also been pondering the girl situation. I’ve talked with Jason a bit about it trying to figure things out. I don’t know really what I’m going to do, and even if I do I’m not going to spill it here on the internet. :p Since I’m a full blown Delta Chi, and this will be my first semester active, things will be different from before. I’m no longer an Associate Member, so I don’t have to worry so much about doing dumb things that get me noticed. It should be chill.

Well, I think that about taps me out for the time being. Hope everyone out there in cyberspace is doing well. “I’ll catch you on the flip side.” - Rocco in Boondock Saints

I hope that your Christmas, or whatever you celebrate, is filled with love, joy, happiness, and fun!

Today has been a great day, the only complaint is that someone is missing, but that will change next year!

Just in case you’re curious what those sites are, you’ll find them listed under my links section on this blog. My Rave / Party scene stuff is on http://www.WhaddupNow.com, that’s where most of my recent effort has been. I still need to add more Delta Chi stuff to this space, and will back-write soon. If you care, and are interested in what I’ve been doing, look below / before this post but don’t go further back then November 13th since I’ll be filling in stuff between now and then.

Some important things as of today…
1. 10 days till I’m done with school
2. 16 days till I’m a Delta Chi
3. 26 days till Together as One

If you’re interested in Together as One (TAO) You can get tickets via Groove Tickets, or VIP tickets here.

When I got back Jorge and Kevin were there and Ryan was not. Eventually Patrick and Jorge wanted to go to the Dorms to hang out with some girls, and being the nice guy I am, I took them to the dorms. I chilled for a bit and said hello to everyone there until they decided to leave for the Delta Chi house to watch Sponge Bob the movie. Not wanting to leave my Xi Class members I headed back to Juan’s house. Once back at the house we started watching the movie “Saw.”

I think it was darn close to 4:00 AM by the time that we finished the movie and Marco went home. At this time Juan, Kevin, and I decided to try to get what sleep we could before our Xi Class Car Wash in four hours. Kevin went to sleep pretty fast on the couch, but it took me until 5:00 AM just to feel like I could sleep, eventually I probably went to sleep around 6:00 AM.

At 7:00 AM my cell phone, Kevin’s cell phone, and Juan’s alarm clock spatted off and woke Kevin and I up. Eventually around 7:20 AM we started to motivate and I went to see if Juan was up. After all of us were done being pissed we had to wake up so early we finally got out of the house and headed to our cars. When we got there Kevin and I saw that we had been cited for towing. Knowing that if a tow truck came by and saw the citation they could tow the cars we both jumped in and headed for the car wash.

We got to the car wash around 8:00 AM and immediately started in on washing Jessica’s (Alejandro’s girl) car. Eventually around 8:30 AM I headed off with Gus to try and flag people down and let them know about the car wash. For three, count them 3 hours Gus and I whored ourselves out trying to get people to come to the car wash. We waved, we hollered, we announced the car wash, and we had fun! Armando was also holding a sign that showed them where the car wash was exactly at, and if we got too many cars I would take over his sign and he would go wash cars to try to get them done faster. All in all it was a great time, I had fun, I got sunburned…good times all around. :p

Towards the end around 11:30 AM when Gus and I had walked over to help finish washing cars, the owner of the 76 station wondered what was going on, why we were doing this, and who gave us permission to do it. After some discussion we were asked to shut down the car wash. We finished up the last few cars and gave the 76 station owner wife’s car a free car wash. We cleaned everything up and talked with him one last time about what to do next time. We now know who the owner is, so we can go directly to him from now on.

At this time I had to go so I could make the last part of the Calvary Chapel Men’s Conference with my dad, so I said my goodbyes and headed out.

So it was 11:00 AM and I was getting ready to go take a shower knowing that Jump 4 Kids was going to happen between 12:00 PM and 1:00 PM so I figured that leaving at 11:40 AM and getting there around 11:55 AM would be fine. Well…plan’s don’t go always as planned. I screwed around checking my mail and lost track of time. I hopped in the shower and got done, but when I looked at the clock after I got out, I realised that something was wrong…it was 11:40 AM. I rushed to get my daily prep done and got out the door as soon as I could.

I finally got to the event at 12:10 PM and immediately started taking pictures of everyone. I don’t think anyone minded, but I still felt bad. Any who, I continued taking pictures and movie clips of everyone and got some good shots. I believe I heard that we were able to raise $800 for the Boys and Girls club close towards the end when I had to go to class.

All in all it was a fun event. I was impressed by how long some of the guys were able to jump for. I did it for 5 minutes and had enough, then again I did have two charlie horses in both legs from the other day’s activities, but hey, whatever.

The party started at 10:00 PM however I was parking the actives cars until 11:00 PM. At that time, once I knew I was off the hook and no more cars needed to be parked, I drank some of my “Vanilla Coke.” Some friends came by upstairs so I offered them some of my coke too, needless to say, it hits hard.

Not too long later one of my friends pulled me into his room along with 2 others from my class for good old Captain Morgan shots. I took it and tried to find something to chase it with, but alas there was nothing nearby to use. I walked over to the bar room to find something to chase the terrible turpentine taste when a beer is thrust into my hand and I’m informed that the beer needed to be drank before he got back from his room. Soooo, down the hatch it goes. At this point my stomach is at maximum torture capacity and I need some time to recover, but as a bonus I am now buzzing.

For the rest of the night I socialized with anyone and everyone and took a bunch of pictures. When I went to upload them I had taken a total of 211 pictures from the party. ( If you weren’t in as many pictures as you wanted next time come seek me out and have me take your picture. All I do is walk around and try to find fun things to shoot pictures of. )

The party finally ended at 2:00 AM when we told everyone that if they aren’t a DChi or chick they gotta go, however that was revoked and changed to everyone in the house that doesn’t live there had to go, gotta love the Police. When they went through the house to make sure everyone that didn’t live there was gone, they found someone that had too much to drink. Since the situation is still under review I won’t go into details, but the fun factor went down from there. In the end I finally got to bed around 6:00 AM.

Since everything was combined into one big blur, and I only got an hour and a half of sleep I’ll just move into the next event that I helped with, Pack-a-Box.

I woke up at 7:30 AM and started to walk around the house to assess the party damage. The house was a mess no matter where you walked. I thought about going to my car to change out of my costume, but due to the fact that I had only gotten one hour of sleep, and I was lazy, I passed and kept it on. Eventually some of the guys woke up, or showed up, for the event and we were out by 9:15 AM. We technically were supposed to be at the place by 9:00 AM, but hey, we did our best and we showed up anyways even with only an hour of sleep or so each. :p Since I was still in costume I got some weird looks, but it’s all right, I like being unique.

After we signed in we were assigned to several different tasks: tearing up boxes, making boxes, packing canned goods in the boxes, moving crates filled with different things, etc. It was fun and I had a blast! I operated a hydraulic lift to move the crates around that the guys breaking up the boxes filled. When I wasn’t needed for that I helped out Gus and Ryan moving the boxes for the assembly line, once the crate was filled I went back and brought them a new one and dropped off the old one. I basically moved around all over the place trying to help out where I could. Around 11:15 AM we took a quick 10 minute break, and by 11:45 AM we were done since we ran out of meat and couldn’t pack correct boxes. After saying our goodbyes we headed back to the house.

Once back at the house not many of us stayed around long because most of us wanted to head back and get some sleep. I had intended on either going to Blizz Con, or doing a movie marathon with my Dad, but things didn’t work that way and I ended up going off to take an hour nap or so. Well 6 hours later I woke up and saw that it was 8:30 PM. I called Rene to see if he was going to Monster Massive, but unfortunately for me, he was already up there standing in line about to go in. Due to multiple circumstances I was unable to go. That did really bum me out, but hey…I got to go back to bed and make up for my loss of sleep. :p